i very nearly killed my dear ephelba yesterday. not in any literal sense. but she almost peed herself to death after i pulled off one of my more questionable driving moves. it was a left turn through a fairly wide open intersection. we were going to the birth control store, the three of us; me, ephelba, and boi. boi had no idea what we were doing or where we were going. he was just playing with his super hero dolls in the back seat. that is until his mother screamed. it was a left turn, as i was saying, and the jingle-head in front of me had decided to wait for some far off oncoming traffic to make its way towards us, so he could wait for them to go by, and perhaps if we're really lucky, wait for some more traffic to come. i despise driving behind these sorts of people, the sort who need to have the oncoming lane perfectly clear before timidly venturing out to complete their left turn. because it just isn't going to happen, not at that intersection, not at that time of day. and then i knew they'd be that slow sort of driver that goes five under the limit and stops to count to sixty at each stop sign. so, sizing all of this up instantly while simultaneously at the same time noting the velocity and distance of the lead car in the approaching pack, i cut deftly behind the snoozer and zip across the street. i was secretly pleased with my massive driving skill. enter the scream. and not just any scream, but a scream so full of fear, pain, terror, anguish and certainty of impending doom, death and destruction that i nearly stopped right in the middle of the street. if she had ever yelled at the dogs like that, they'd NEVER pee in the house. one of those screams that makes you stop right in your tracks. which was the last thing the screamer wanted. she threatened to get out of the car if i did that again. i had visions of her clawing her way through the roof. boi was very nearly crying, ephelba was crying, and i was still a little rattled from the scream. but i reassured ephelba, and ephelba reassured boi, and i drove rather more sedately than i normally would for the rest of the way there and back.